ULearn14 - Coaching Conversations in Educational Leadership

Coaching Conversations for Educational Leaders – Mary-Anne Murphy (CORE Ed) @mamurphy2

Clack and White Thinking – dealing with the facts and what’s going on. Still need compassion and heart.

Outcomes:

Learn how to build rapport with people

Etc

Road Map

1)      mBraining Research and it’s application

2)      Understanding how our brain makes meaning

3)      Active Listening and it’s application

4)      Reflective Quetioning and it’s application

Will be uploaded onto the

Intro to someone new

Discuss how you wish for us to work together today – “Our Ways of Working”

Love how she uses Te Kotahitanga refocussing tools – TK hand up

Our Agreed Ways of Working

·         Confidential /In Confidence

·         No Judgement

·         Respect

·         Everyone’s voices are heard

·         Collaboration

·         Do tasks as set

We often make assumptions that we will all be working the same way. Being explicit about a co-constructed way of working.

Dilts Logical Levels of Learning

Purpose – for whom?

Identity – who? Sense of self GUT BRAIN

Values and Beliefs – why? Permission and motivation HEART BRAIN

Capabilities – How? Inc. methods and strategies HEAD BRAIN

Behaviour – what? HEAD BRAIN

Environment – where? Context HEAD BRAIN

Multiple Brains – mBraining

Head Brain – Creativity 80 bill neurons

Heart Brain - Compassion

Enteric (gut) brain – Courage

Head Brain Prime Functions

Cognitive Perception

Heat Brain

Emotions – emotional processing

Values – processing what’s important to you and your priorities

Relational Affect – your felt connection

Gut Brain Prime Functions

Core identity – a deep and visceral sense of core self, and determining at the deepest levels what is ‘self’ versus ‘not-self’

Self-Preservation – protection of self, safety, boundaries, hungers and aversions

Mobilization – motility (?), impulse for action, gutsy courage and the will to act

Listen for the language and look for the gestures.

Our Brain is a meaning making machine. 

BEARS - gather an image of a bear in your mind. 

Everyone has a different interpretation - how many options for mis-interpretation.

Active listening: The Worst Mistakes - Pic on Twitter. 

Timing and feeling the need to continue working on what you're doing 

Sometimes it's not the time for that talk. "Hey, I really appreciate it that you've come to me to talk about this. Can we set a time to talk about it further?"

SIMPLE - But not EASY. 

We bring all of our experiences and knowledge - We need to leave it just there - Need to create a space of nothing. And then from there - anything can come. 

Don't go into a conversation and expecting it to happen a certain way. 

Going to this conversation from a place of authenticity. 

I'm not going to try to twist what you've said into what I want you to do. 

Reflective Listening - pic on Twitter

Don't parrot back

Cherry Pick - find the values and key points

Active Listening Activity

Groups of 3-4

practising Cherry picking 

Be aware of how you position yourself and your body. 

Imaging. Following how they sit and place their hands. Mirroring. Creating a system of rapport. Pace and Lead. BRILLIANT. 

Start to Listen First.

Potential Questions:

How is that affecting you?

What's the outcome that you want?

What have you tried already?

What has worked well in the past?

What's the problem you're having with this?

How are you not achieving/doing this?

What would happen if you ...Rest of the questions are on the hand out!

Questioning Exercise:

Same scenario - Use questions.