Statistics are actually pretty cool...

Throughout my own schooling, mathematics have never been one of my strong points. One particular maths teacher once told me that because I didn't show that I could do it then I would never achieve anything in life. Now while it's great to live your subject and think that its an important aspect to daily life... I would never tell a kid in my class that because they couldn't do x in English.. they wouldn't succeed in life.

Interestingly enough, my passion to show her I could do life better was portrayed in every other subject than hers. When I got my degree I remember feeling this old anger reflame and felt the need to show off to her that I had succeeded despite not being 'good' at maths.  And despite the fact that she wasn't anywhere near my graduation... I still felt the need to say in my head.. "See.. I can achieve."

Isn't it more interesting then that one of the best observations I've ever done was watching a maths class. I saw how a more positive teacher encouraged her students and how she related everything they were learning to her students. There wasn't any random trains or lollies eaten by a mammoth kid and not shared with her friends. Instead she taught them volume by getting her students out of the classroom and measuring the shed that needed to house the rugby posts so that they could be re-painted. She taught them area this way as well.

My favourite aspects of Maths were always the ones other kids didn't enjoy.. like algebra and triganometry. I liked to do estimations and predictions and testing out my theories. I liked that one where you test on how many times the dice will roll a four. And liked learning about different travel times and time zones and roman numerals because they had an impact on travelling. Because the majority of the kids didn't enjoy it or that they took a while to get it, they'd be spoonfed the formulas and we'd move onto the next topic.

One of my worst moments in schooling was that when I got my tonsils out I didn't go back to school for ages. I don't know why now though. But from that massive gap in my learning... might have only been 2 weeks but to an 8 year old it seems like a lifetime from her favourite teacher.. I missed out on learning how to tell the difference between analogue and digital time. The other part is not ever getting the chance to relearn the timestables as I was always too shame to show that weakness.

So since then.. I made it an effort to never tell people I sucked at maths, and instead focussed on making others appreciate what I was good at. In a way I had a very fixed mindset about my ability in maths.

Eventually I got proud of my failure in maths and would laugh it off. Particularly when put into the 'cabbage' maths class for remedial maths.

Because I had already switched off to learning in maths, I have no idea whether my later maths teachers tried to reengage me or use more relative means to teach me better.

If they had asked me how many potatoes would I need to peel to feed my family for dinner or asked what size chicken would suit a couple or one person, or asked the different quantities it took in order to make a cake or scones.. all of which were ways my Nana was teaching me about maths through baking and cooking.

Or if they had said what kind of hook would you need and what density of fishing line and what style of rod you would need in order to make sure that ever elusive kingfish would not break the hook, line or rod... or asked what size sinker you'd need to avoid getting caught in the weeds at the bottom of the ocean when trying to catch multiples of pipers for bait.. or if they had asked how long it would take to drain a car of oil during a oil change.. things I learnt from my mum and Grandad.

Perhaps I would have a better understanding of maths.

Regardless to all of that. This post was merely to talk about how cool the statistics were on the Blogger dashboard around the many hits my blog gets. It shows where you guys are when reading this (just the country) and also the links you use in order to get here to read it. And it also shows the different browsers you guys use... not surprisingly a larger number of Chrome users out there!

There had been a huge surge in the past four months of people reading my blog and I've loved watching the graphs showing the amount of you reading it and the logs of which blog was read more.

My next job is to have a good look at these stats and figure out what kind of posts you guys like the most.. by learning how to analyse the data I'll be able to not only see the style of writing that appeals to most but it might also show the kind of things I talk about that shows my passion and I wonder whether this has made an impact on my readers.

So a huge thanks to all of you. Would love your comments and your G+'s and adding me to your circles... or even a continued added hit to the site makes me happy as it shows me that you guys are reading. And that what I have to say is readable, important or even worth looking at. And that means alot. Thankyou :)

Thinking about a revolution.. harder than starting one...

In the last week I've felt increasingly like I'm unfocussed, unsure of myself and not sure of what I want.

Why?

I spent a fantastic two days in Wellington.

I met with MPs and talked Educational policies.

I discussed some of the big issues we are dealing with in schools.

I met with an author and discussed my great uncles achievements and our whakapapa.

I got excited about the premiere and release of 'What we do in the Shadows' and got some good resources of the film from a Wellington cafe for my class.

I engaged with school PD on reflective practice.

I took one of our PRT's with me to an #eduignite evening in Hamilton and caught up on the #edchatnz feed when I got home via a friend's fantastic Storify.

So what's the problem?

I feel behind in everything I'm doing. My classes are going well and I'm teaching well I think but I am not following the course outline enough. I don't know where everyone else is up to. I don't know if I'm marking right. I don't know whether I'm helping or making it worse.

I feel the consistent pile of things to do slowly crushing me.

I feel the inspiration ebbing out of me. Others say I inspire them but it makes me feel weird.. because I want to inspire others but want inspiration too. I want more time to become inspired and need time to create more interesting lessons.

Despite starting a new blog this week for my creative writing, I don't have the time to get it started properly.

I want to continue doing all of the extra-curricular stuff I'm doing but feel like it's pulling me down.

I want to go to as many conferences as possible and I'm going to three in the next holidays - PPTA Maori Teachers conf, NZATE English Teachers conf and lastly presenting at the CLESOL one  in Wellington via webcam so am counting that one as another.

I'm also going to the #edchatnz conf in August and am definitely excited about it.
I want to go to ULearn14 and have been thinking about crowdsourcing my application fee. I think I should show my principal my proposal even though it wasn't accepted by the DP in charge of PD. It is crazy expensive and I doubt I can save the money in time so may have to go to the bank or worse somewhere else to get it funded. It's an amazing opportunity and I see it as an investment in myself.

I feel like I've lost my way a little and know that in a couple of days I'll look back at this post and this week and laugh. Because the reality is.. it is so much to do with workload and stress and feeling like I've given my all and it's still not 'enough'.

It's stressful knowing that there is only one real teaching term left. I worry that my classes aren't ready. That I'm not ready. That I have somewhere, somehow lost my edge.

I am so thankful to my colleagues on Thursday afternoon for snapping me out of my little hole I'd created for myself. I'm thankful for the opportunity to share ideas at last night's Connected Rotorua session. I'm thankful for the fact that my students are overwhelmingly amazing and my PLN too. I'm thankful that the dog still nudges me for hugs despite the long hours I put in at school and thankful to the cat who purrs in my arms rather than ignoring me for my attention of the crazy dog rather than him. I'm thankful to my friends who put up with the long distances and lengths between catching up. Same too with my family who wait patiently til I come home and see them. I'm thankful to those who came before me and those who are still to come.

Mostly though.. I'm thankful that tomorrow is another day and hopefully after today's rest and relaxation I will feel a hell of a lot better and will be back to myself.

And above all else. I must realise I can't change everything and that patience is the key to virtue. I need to stop getting frustrated and just accept things for how they are and continue what I'm doing to continue the process of change regardless of whether there is any percieved uptake. I am making a difference. I am changing things. I hope it is helpful and I hope that it is kind. I hope I'm able to inspire myself to stop feeling useless. I hope that this post was useful.

PPTA Opportunities

In the past year since being a part of PPtA... I have learnt so much. I learnt about who I am, what I stand for and more importantly why I fight for our collective rights.

For those who read my blog outside of NZ or are not aware of what the PPTA is.. it's a collective of teachers who are involved within the teacher's union.

When I was at teacher's college I signed up. It could be part of the way I was brought up but I see being part of the union as a safeguard for myself and an investment in my own future.

When I was at my first school my HOD at the time took me along to a meeting. Stoked I went because I caught that bug.

Since March I've been to Wellington for PPTA meetings and conferences and I've learnt so much. I have seen how meetings are meant to be run and how people from other branches (schools) deal with similar issues we deal with. Not only is it good for strategic management, but it's great PD.

This year has been my Yes Year. I have said yes to lots of fabulous opportunities and at times felt a little overwhelmed with all of the expectations but again, I've learnt lots. I am a strong believer in making your own chances and think that even if you believe that you have a pre-destined future.. you still have the opportunity to make the most of your lives.

Right now I'm on my way back to Rotorua airport and know that I'm leaving having had left my mark yet again in Wellington. This opportunity is huge. Mainly because I've taken advantage of a possibility and made the most of a suggestion to get more involved.

Within PPTA at my branch, I am the Network of Establishing Teachers (NET) Representative.

I am the regional representative for the NETs for our region.

As a result of the Issues and Organising conference back in March I was nominated and chosen to be a part of the Establishing Teachers Committee as well as the Establishing Teachers Conference Organising Committee. The conference is next year from the 8th-10th of April 2015. 

Yesterday we worked on organising the upcoming ET's conference and it was an incredibly productive day. Today we had the opportunity as the ETC to talk with a bunch of MP's and ask them about their education policies. Members from Green and NZ First. We also talked about the IES and EDUCANZ. Loads of acronyms in teaching and especially in the PPTA.

Overall I absolutely adored the opportunity and am incredibly grateful to those who nominated and then believed in my ability to continue with this nationally. Am looling forward to the next ET Conference meeting in August.  Also looking forward to the Annual PPTA conferene later in the year where we vote on policies and help make them more indepth.

Watch this space for more info.

Links about PPTA:

Want to join but don't know how?

Why should you join?

Bulletin coming out soon. :)

Making and Creating and Continuing to Create More Inquiries...

An inquiry is defined in teaching as:

For me, an inquiry means that I am learning about something in particular that I want to change about my practice, something I want to learn how to do better, or maybe something I want to find out - perhaps about how I use data and evidence to understand my students better.

Over the past three or so years... really since I began life to be honest.. I've been inquiring about a lot of things.

- How to maintain 'control' through classroom 'management'  by maintaining professional boundaries as well as maintaining professional relationships?
- How to develop those professional relationships while staying safe professionally?
- How to avoid pitfalls in my teaching career?
- How to navigate workplace bullying and micro-managing?
- How to develop stronger professional relationships to create a more relaxed environment as part of my classroom management strategies?
- How to continue being a positive person/teacher/educator despite the deficit theorisers in my midst?
- How to continue professionally developing myself as a teacher without causing too much stress or difference of opinions by others?
- How to enforce consequences within punitive styles of behaviour management?
- How to use positive behaviour for learning strategies in my classroom to emphasise the kinds of attitudes I want to see from my students?
- How to successfully create a positive environment where students tell each other off for having fixed-mindsets and for using negative behaviours and attitudes?
- How to successfully encourage and inspire students to read more - for intrinsic reward rather than extrinsic?
- How to improve students' learning by making them feel confident about their progress despite the rising levels of where they're meant to be 'AT'?
- How to create meaningful discussions?
- How to help my quieter students talk more in class?
- How to engage the unruliest of students?
- How to teach students I just do NOT get along with despite all of my own behaviour management strategies and my own relaxing techniques?
- How to maintain professionalism without losing respect for other educators for their actions rather than what they say?
- How to continue being myself and avoid becoming 'jaded'?

The reality is that reflecting is different for everyone and everyone's reflections are as valuable as the next person's. They're valuable because they're personal and most of all... they're valuable because they're reflective. We can learn from them as a result.

I had a heap more here.. but blogger on my phone putted out from the flight to getting back onto the tarmac. So oh well.

That will do. Just get out there and do it. Question yourself and your teaching style and how you interact with your students. Figure out whether what you are doing is working and if it is... great! If not.. what else can you do?

On time for my flight... YUSS

When you're an hour early you can be a little smug.

A huge comparison to my thoughts and anxieties last time I was here and I'd missed my plane.

My nan always would be at least an hour early to everything. That includes dropping me off to school in the morning from when I was 16. Not exactly the cool thing to do. But at least I was on time. And I could have walked anyway. So... option one was always first choice despite being a relative loner for the first half an hour at least in the morning. Eventually I'd muck around in the morning to avoid being THAT early. I got smart.

Or... as I've learnt as I've grown up... stupid.

Mucking around only makes you later. And makes it look like you were meaning to WAG rather than just being a little late so it looked 'cool'. And then you get into trouble and get one of those 'reputations'.

Reputations at high school are really difficult to get rid of.

For example my reputation for hanging out with the stoner kids, and the Christian kids, and the delinquent kids and the weird witchy girls and the girls who had their own kind of reputation.

It just so happened that since the age of five years old I've been increasingly a social butterfly that likes to make new friends through new connections and then like to web them all together... so more of a social butterfly spider... but a beautiful and harmless one :P

Perhaps that's why I tend to create a huge range of people around me and have a multitude of friends and people who I know - and then a closer circle of friends who I know really well... and then about 5 or so incredibly close mates who are more like sisters/brothers.

I don't quite know why this post went from being on time for my flight to talking about the kinds of friends I have... but there it is.

Yuss. Stoked I'm early. Looking forward to a day of organising the Network of Establishing Teachers Conference for next year :) And then tomorrow... discussing some more issues around NET stuff. Love Wellington. Hopefully it won't be toooooo rainy or windy. And looking forward to catching up with my cousin - who isn't really my cousin - but her granddad is my granddad's sisters husband. And really my cousin is my little sister's best friend. But we act like we're sisters. It's weird. She's weird. Probably why it works :)

Anyway... thinking that's enough of this post for now. Mhmmmmm. :)

Student Blogging: te timatanga 2

I wanted to create a blog post that had a list of all of the posts I've written and those that others have written as well - about student blogging. The risks, gains and possible safety issues and concerns. Thought it would be a good idea to start collecting a list of all of the research I've done - just for me - in the hopes that I can start to help implement digital citizenship at our school.

So here they are - most recent blog posts first:
Student Blogging: Te Timatanga - my thoughts on safety issues and gains :)
Student Blogging - Resources
Kidblog Journey: The Beginning - The use of kidblogs.org as a starter - bulk user creation = easy!
Policy for Student Photography Usage - cybersafety and digital citizenship awareness
Digital Literacy: Digital Citizenship - Where my thinking began truly...Read this one first!!
First Lesson Doing PBL - Hopes to use blogging to allow my Y9's deeper level thinking and a way to portray their investigations to their peers, whanau and outside world possibly - Currently just using Word - will be transferring to Google Docs soon though!

Here is an extra list for some of the research I have done in the process towards this:
Digital Citizenship in NZ Schools - PDF Overview - Great Resource!
Netsafe Kit for Schools - Transitioning to Cyber Safety and then to Digital Citizenship
How to Use the Netsafe Kit - Must Read!
How do we teach Digital Literacy to Digital Natives - Thanks to Edudemic and Tom Whitby
Help Kids Start a Blog: Get them reading, writing, thinking, creating - From +amy mascott
Staff Discussion Points: Learn Guide Protect - From Netsafe
Combating Cyber Bullying: LGP - From Netsafe
Citizenship in Blogging - Using Paper: LGP  - From Netsafe
Playing and Staying Safe Online: LGP - From Netsafe
Exploring 21C Literacy - Thanks to Michelle Budge
Global Digital Citizen 
Cartoon Videos Describing Internet Safety - Thanks to GDC
12 Timeless PBL Resources - Great links for Project Based Learning
Do's of Student Blogging - Thanks to Doug Peterson
Using Photos in your blog under the Creative Commons Licencing
Blogbooker - How to create your own book from your blog posts!
Peer Editing - Some resources for students editing their own and others' work

Digi Natives and DigiCit - Teaching Respect and Responsibility

http://blogs.kqed.org/mindshift/2013/05/teaching-respect-and-responsibility-even-to-digital-natives/

I have collated all of this for future reference - and also so that I can share my ideas with colleagues, BOT, my own whanau, students and their families as well.

Oral History Interviewing...Real Life

One of the best parts of my honours was learning about oral histories and conducting our own oral history interviews. I've been thinking a lot about the elderly woman I interviewed back then - partly because I still feel guilty for not following through with the ethics side of the interview (giving the interview to the University to hold for five years - of which it's now past that time...) and also because having moved from Hamilton three years ago - I've lost contact with her.

Oral histories are conducted to get true accounts from people who witnessed events in their lives, or may simply have their own story to tell. It's amazing what you learn from someone when you take the time to listen. The other aspect to oral history interviews is the fact that you get a real perspective of life and what it was like in their generation. It's an honour being a part of an oral history interview - because even though you are the researcher there are lots of parts to it where you are guiding the questions but also allowing them to branch off and let them take control of what they want to tell as well. Eventually that process in which they tell their story becomes yours as well.

I've recently been thinking about historical events in my own life and whether someone in the future may ask me these questions about how I related to events overseas and what my thoughts were regarding them etc.

I wonder mainly because there are lots of events which I actually don't pay that much attention to. And also because I have asked similar questions to my own grandmothers and grandfather about events in history - and if I took the time to ask them things that they wanted to tell me instead - I might get a more developed response rather than the one I try to get out of them.

This kind of open questioning and interviewing process is something that I've always been interested in - in fact it's something I wanted to do for my dissertation (part of my honours in history). I wanted to interview and use diaries from men and women involved with the Vietnam war and discuss with them their reactions and feelings upon coming home after the war - to the opinions and perspectives of those who stayed behind. The lecturer who was meant to support me in that process pulled out as he was too busy at the time - and I had to quickly find someone else who would be willing.

Unfortunately I had to change tack and chose another topic with one of my favourite lecturers as my supervisor - which was around the comparisons between what Mary Wollstonecraft thought about education and women's rights and how her own feminist critcs believed that she didn't do 'enough' for women...back then. It's a great topic and if I'd had more time (was doing my own teacher training and practicums at the same time as trying to research...) I could have created something awesome.

My third idea and the one which I'm still leaning towards (despite being told it's more of a Masters thesis) is a mix between education and history. The changes we've made to our teaching styles particularly in regards to the introduction of the Native Schools Act of _____ compared with Te Kotahitanga and the implementation of that matauranga and way of teaching. It's an important piece of of research, close to my heart and more importantly something relevant to my own inquiries as a new teacher.

Within that idea I'd like to do some research around how Maori were taught and how they are being taught and whether with the implementation of Te Kotahitanga there have been 'enough' of a shift to encourage our Maori students to strive harder and have more of a growth mindset about themselves.

Yes - I know it sounds huge. And it is.

But there has to be a way that I can narrow the field a little and focus perhaps just on the Native Schools Act and do some sort of analysis on legislation and primary sources - particularly letters and newspaper articles, perhaps diaries if there are any around still. I know that the NZ Collection whanau at the Library of Waikato University would be able to help - and I know it's only a phone call away... but then there is also my own teaching to do... all the extra stuff I do... and of course finding a supervisor who is used to my way of thinking... or searching for a lecturer that could help narrow my thinking, and widen it at the same time. Who knows... this could already have been done.

I feel out of the loop of historical thinking, analyses and historiography... It frustrates me because it used to be such a huge part of my life. Now that I'm not properly teaching history it makes it even harder - because as an English teacher  - though I try to teach within the context of history as much as possible... it's just not the same.

I also think that by getting my courage back - namely my own self-belief that my intelligence is connected with my historical understanding and awareness - and if I have my honours all finished (just my dissertation to go) and if I attempt to figure out a Masters thesis... then perhaps I could teach history at my school. I love the school I teach at. Love it to bits. But I miss teaching history. I miss the discussions and the indepth critical thinking. I miss university life too where I can get lost in a conversation for three + hours and be okay with it.

Ultimately... I just want to get my dissertation done so that I can have closure on that part of my life and know that I am smart... regardless of possibly getting 50th grade honours for it being so late.

It'd be nice to hear that praise again. That I know what I'm talking about. Even though I know that.. sometimes it's just nice hearing it from others. That recognition and the appreciation. If you've gotten to the bottom of this post... thanks :) If I lost you ages ago - that's cool too!

Naku noa,

A